Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Gratitudes ..... Frustrations .... Crazy

In many ways I am incredibly grateful for all this summer has brought.
Here we are at 31 weeks and all appears well so far. In many ways so far my third trimester is actually more comfortable than my second. I have much less belly/tendon/groin pain, which is a huge relief.
My husband has been an amazing trooper, taking on all the cleaning, grocery shopping, cooking, and care of our fur-baby Pepper.
We're so close to meeting these two little ones and we have an awesome support network - some people in the process of preparing for the first few months (my Mom is cooking 30 meals for our freezer) or waiting in the wings to be asked when the time comes that we need help. I truly feel blessed.
However, this summer has also carried some great frustrations.
When you aren't allowed to do much (or are just so exhausted you can't) and you're feeling all nesty, you want the stuff you get done to stay done! And you want to get everything ready... everything, everything. Like... a messy closet is going to destroy your happiness and render you incapable of parenthood, everything.
So when I saw our beautiful nursery tidied and almost ready one day and then torn all apart the next, a minor meltdown ensued. The husband needed to start from scratch to put shelves in. Really? Really? I have not seen his cost/benefit analysis on that decision and something tells me I wouldn't agree even if I saw it.
On top of that is a major deck reno that started with tearing the railings off in June and we're now almost in September and it's not even close to done. This weekend found me staring at a hole that went straight through the deck and down through the ceiling of the room beneath. Rotten wood torn out and two sides of the house without siding nearly brought me to tears. GAAAAH.
The very last thing you want to see when you're staring down the last few weeks of a TWIN pregnancy is the nursery torn apart and the siding coming off of your house as rainy season approaches.
We replaced the majority of our windows and our front doors this year too.....you know so the winter wind doesn't rattle the curtains this year. There was an issue with the doors and they said they couldn't do them, then they could, they were installed and then a few pieces needed fixing. They still aren't completely finished....but it's close!
I don't need close. I don't want progress even. I want done! I want ready! I want everything so freaking clean and tidied and organized that absolutely nothing needs doing after babies are born.
And I don't have a hospital bag packed either!
So babies, you need to stay inside and grow for a good long time yet. Because I'll lose my mind otherwise...... I may not be in full posession of it even now.

1 comment:

  1. Too funny friend. You will be ready when the time is right no matter if your closets are perfect or the deck is done. But I can get how you must feel, getting so close!!!!