It's amazing to me that Samson and Rachel are nearly 2 months old already (5 weeks corrected).
We've progressed amazingly with breastfeeding. Latching is not an issue now....keeping them awake to do a whole feed sometimes is. However, I'm just this week able to now solely breastfeed one and generally I provide them enough that they don't need a top up of formula. YAYAY! This is an amazing accomplishment that I had nearly given up on.
Last week I finally let myself off the hook regarding breastfeeding. I'm no longer agonizing over whether the baby has fully drained the breast or exactly how much time they spend on each and I'm not actively trying to increase my supply. This has greatly reduced my stress. I don't pump religiously and I'm not worrying over how long they go between feeds as much. So far they're generally feeding every 3 hours during the day and every 4 hours at night. But every so often they go 5 hours and we LOOOOVE those nights/days. If my supply totally dries up by doing this, well, I gave it my very best shot and at least they had breastmilk for these first 8, most important weeks. I even caught a cold from Andrew this week so they've got all those antibodies too. :) Bright side!!
Speaking of the bright side, I'm slowing regaining my longer term perspective on things. Each day is not quite as isolated as it was and I'm able to lift my head and see longer term.
The babies will not always be this needy and in fact they will very shortly be very different. In spite of the challenges I've faced with feeling like the Mom and bonding, we're getting closer all the time and these challenges are normal, especially with twins whom you have half the time with.
This time last year I was so sad in so many ways. I was hopeful but also sinking frequently into despair at ever having a family and being a Mom. Oh how relieved I would have been had I known a year later I'd be drowning in babies....babies, babies everywhere.
We have our special challenges but the most important things are going well. Babies are growing well, both get breastmilk, both get held when they cry, and we're doing all we can to care for Sam's special sensitivities. I'm hopeful he'll grow out of his reflux and gas pains in a few more weeks. And Christmas is coming!!
Christmas is such a nostalgic time for me and this year will be even more special with our two little miracles. I bought them matching Baby's first Christmas tree ornaments and we'll get stockings soon.