Tuesday, February 28, 2012


Oh my babies! MY Babies! I'm finally enjoying them the way I imagined, dreamed of enjoying them.
We laugh every day. We play. We tickle feet and dress in cute clothes. We talk and talk and talk. I watch them sleep and I greet them with smiles when they wake up.

THIS is what I wanted. It's so nice to have arrived at this place... finally. I'm a big fan of babies. I'm not a big fan of the newborn stage!

We're slowly turning a corner with sleeping. Master Samson is more and more consistently stretching out his nighttime feeds. Although I feared it would never happen ...or only happen if he was tucked in bed next to me. Last night Sam went 7 hours and then 4 hours between feeds and spent the whole night in his crib! Wooohooo! This means better and longer sleep for Momma!

Miss Rachel seems to have her day and nighttime feeds mixed up. She will go 6 hours without eating during the day and then want to eat every 3 hours at night. We're working on this. It helps immensely that I still have my Mom here during the week. She wakes up for Rachel at night; I wake up for Samson. Until last night I had the harder job I assure you. Miss Rachel falls back asleep SOOO easily at night. Samson sometimes requires 30 minutes of crying before he finally succumbs.

Last night I finally got some spontanious giggling from Rachel. She was just in SUCH a good mood, all I had to do was laugh back and she'd giggle and giggle. SO nice to see. Samson just gives laughs away all day long, Rachel generally makes you work for them.

We still spend our days moving them from one activity to the next: playmat, bouncy chair in the kitchen, jumperoo, Mommy's arms, swing!

Samson's eyes are still grey but there is more and more brown sneaking in around the pupil every week. Rachel's eyes remain a lovely blue. Sam's head seems to get bigger every week and Rachel appears more delicate all the time. :)

Some days Sam's drooling out of control. But I'll take drool over spit ups anyday. Spit ups are still common but not nearly as common as a month ago. In fact, on the weekend he went 24 hours without a spit up!!

Yes, things are definitely getting easier.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

4 Months

We all have our strengths and our weaknesses. I've been trying to focus on my strengths lately and not beat myself up too much for my weaknesses.

With the twins I've learned that although I had wonderful thoughts of them being solely breastfed and loved totally equally and me learning all kinds of developmentally appropriate games, reality is a bit different. I'm struggling to define what it means to be a good-enough Mommy to them... not perfect, but good enough for me and them to be happy.

Sam and Rachel have their strengths too.

Rachel understands sound, she gets that a toy is making a sound and will bat at a toy to make the sound happen again. Her eyes light up when she recognizes a tune you've sung before and she will pay close attention when you create a rhythm.

Rachel also has favourite toys....those with faces that smile at her! She has a special place in her heart for a particular lion that smiles down at her on the playmat.

Rachel laughed last week for the first time. It was for her Daddy who was playing peek-a-boo with her. Adorable! It takes a lot to make her laugh but when she does it's so rewarding.

Samson rolled over for the first time last week from back to front. What was amazing is that his Daddy had just gotten home and we got to witness it and cheer together. We witnessed the first roll from front to back a couple of weeks ago together too. Sam is much more physical than Rachel but not as good with his dexterity.

Sam's favourite toy is people. :) He laughed for me several weeks ago during a bath and later that week for no apparent reason found me hilarious to watch. He's way more interested in chatting with a person or watching them than paying attention to an inanimate object. I have a sneaking suspicion that Rachel is going to break his heart a thousand times over their childhood.... I think he's going to want her attention and time much more than she wants his.

Both Sam and Rachel are now regularly pulling anything they get hold of into their mouths. And their hands are little pincers ready to grip anything in their reach. They also scooch themselves backwards on their backs and off the playmat regularly.
Both are now looving their baths and have outgrown the tiny infant bath we first had.

They've also outgrown their goopy eyes, bad eczema, and baby acne. YAY! As long as Mommy stays gluten free and avoids soy, it looks like we'll all have good skin. :)

Sunday, February 5, 2012


Both Samson and Rachel have been blossoming from newborn into baby over the past 3 weeks. It has been making life easier for us all.
They both hold their heads up now. So much easier to carry them around!
Samson is spitting up MUCH less. So much less that we haven't used a bib in over a week! Many days the past two weeks, he's been in the same outfit all day. We used to often go through 2 or 3 outfits with each feeding! What a relief this is.
Their behaviour is more predictable too and we are better at reading their signals. When Sam is fussy, he's tired. Otherwise he's a super happy baby. So we need to get him to sleep quick...what a relief it's been to figure this out.
They both talk a lot more now and the sounds they make are wonderful. They also listen so much you can almost believe you're having a conversation.
Both are now good at batting toys around and finding their thumbs/hands to chew on. Often they'll talk as they chew which makes for some very funny sounds.
Rachel is a bit of a night owl, happy in the evenings and goes to sleep quickly when she tires out. Samson is a morning baby, wakes up so happy he doesn't even need to eat right away.
I just wish they slept more reliably! At night they often still want to eat every 3 hours and feeding takes at least half an hour and longer if they don't fall asleep afterwards. Rachel is sooo much better about this than Samson is. Sam is a nightmare at night sometimes.
Oh how I dream of more than 3 hours of sleep in a row. Right now 2 is considered good, 3 wonderful, 4 unlikely, and 5 a distant dream. I'm promised this will happen someday. Hopefully when they start on solids we'll get longer stretches of sleep...?
Some things aren't changing and I'm glad of it. Samson still sucks his tongue when he sleeps. My Dad thinks this makes him look like Winston Churchill. ha ha ha. I think it's adorable!
Rachel is more a looker than a talker and this is very endearing, her big blue eyes and flashing smile have so much to say all on their own.
And I'm doing better as time goes on. I'm enjoying moments more, am more relaxed, less anxious and just generally feeling more like myself. That is also a major relief!
I look forward to weekends when it's just Andrew and I and the babes. This is our first weekend alone in over a month. We took them on a long walk yesterday and today Andrew took Rachel on a shopping excursion. As much as we need and appreciate the help from my Mom during the week, it's so nice to just be a family of 4. I look forward to the day when I'll be comfortable with them on my own. We're taking baby steps to get to that point but we'll get there.
Gotta run, laundry calls.....as does vacuuming and sleep before Sam wakes up again.