Friday, December 18, 2015

Expressing it

Cierra has started to express herself so much. She has lots of words: 'here you go' is my favourite. And she learned to sign 'more' after me showing it to her over a single lunch. Genius! :)
But the physical growth has been tremendous this month.
A few weeks after she started walking, she realized how quickly she could change direction. So she would walk to you and just as you thought she wanted to get picked up and she had your undivided attention, she would pivot and walk the other direction, kind of looking back at you: "see that? Did ya see what I did there?" Then she'd pivot and come back and do it again, over and over.
Now she has started walking backwards with a super funny look on her face, a sly little smile, gaze locked on mine as she slowly goes backwards, then kicks it into forward again and zooms right at me. She is so proud of herself.
This week she has started playing more like the big kids do. She wants to be chased so she squeels when you reach out to catch her and she asks to be tickled by tipping her chin waaaay back so you can get her neck.
She is loving the idea of surprise, I quickly turn around and tickle under her chin, the faster the better, she squeels and giggles.
She reminds me to brush her teeth at night after we nurse by pointing to her index finger and saying, 'aaaah.' She is also helping with chores just like the twins used to, getting all the cutlery out of the dishwasher one utensil at a time and handing them to me, saying, "heeh goh." I say, "thank you" for every single one. :)
The best though was today when Rachel wanted to help too. So Cierra handed the utensils to her as Rae stood on a stool and put them each away in the drawer.
 "Heeh goh."
"Thanks Sara"
Over and over.
She is still a baby in so many ways, yet so independent too. 

Monday, November 23, 2015

Cierra's 1st Birthday

Cierra turned 1 yesterday. What a great year it has been! And what a great year this next one will be too.
We had a little party and I think the best part for Cierra was the balloons. She loves them!! The twins helped open the presents and Rachel helped her blow out the candle on the cake. :)
She took her first steps 2 weeks ago and is now practically running around the house. She is fearless and so eager to keep up and participate in all the big kid activities.
Cierra now wants to rough house on the floor with the twins and they are so good with her. They let her headbutt them and they laugh or pretend to fall over. She giggles whenever she manages to sit on top of one of them or pin an arm or leg overjoyed with the thrill of it.
Rachel  has started giving Cierra goodnight hugs and kisses. Cierra positively GLOWS with pleasure over this and then reaches out to attempt to return the favour.
She waves goodnight to Daddy. Last night he blew her a kiss and she responded by putting her hand to her cheek, like she had caught it or like she was trying to send one back.
Oh what a joy!
On Friday I took her for a little photo shoot to smash a cake and have some fun. She wasn't interested in the cake really but we got a few good pictures I'm sure. She was pretty serious the whole time she was in front of the camera though, not the sunny smiley girl we capture at home.
We are so blessed to have her and cannot imagine life without her.

Sunday, November 8, 2015

Twin News

Sam and Rachel turned 4! Wooohooo four year olds are fun.
We went all out and had a party company do this year's birthday bash at a community centre with a pirate ship bouncy castle and face painting. I made a ridiculous number of cupcakes which all got consumed and we invited all the friends (my friend's kids) they've ever played with.
There were 20 children! It was loud and it was fun and only 2 hours and the twins loved it.
I figured this would be the last year that we could get away with inviting our friends and not their school friends so we might as well go big. In reality a lot of those kids were the younger siblings of the child we invited so there were a lot of tiny ones there too as well as their parents.
It was a lot less stressful for me hosting it outside of my house and I actually ended up feeling like I got a chance to chat a little with people.
Sam and Rachel are so great and I can already tell 4 is going to be a magical age.
They absolutely love their preschool class and have learned so so much these past two months. They have friends and they have new songs and new ideas and question after question after question. :)
They still play very physically together rolling all over each other, tackling, pretending to be dogs and cats and owners and ducks and dragons and monsters. And that physicality is still shared with me too, especially now that I'm not carrying around a tiny newborn, the twins are back to climbing on me when I'm down on the floor. They sit in my lap for hugs. They ask for tickles and kisses. They want to be picked up.....I usually answer no to that one these days.
They LOVED Halloween this year. There was no hesitation at all about running up to the neighbours doors and shouting trick or treat. They even remembered to say thank you sometimes!
Sam is a boy with a lot of energy and a lot of creativity. At school they have never seen Sam in a bad mood and he easily joins in with any other group of kids when he wants to join their play. He can also run or bike or jump for 45 minutes without slowing down during playtime!
Rachel is a quiet girl who knows her own mind and loves to have one special friend to play with. Right now the special ones are Austin ('he's my best friend') and Addy at preschool. She likes being in charge when she can be but mostly just wants to be accepted by others and she is always the first to make a new friend at the playground.
Both of them are very artsy! They love doing crafts, which now include tape and glue and scissors so this is a much messier process than when it was just crayons and markers.
They can play quietly when I ask them to and can ask for what they need as they need it. It's a lovely change from the toddler grumpies that would strike without warning.
Oh I do love my big kids so much and I love being home with them to help see them make sense of the world around them as it expands.
Very interesting conversation about police and car crashing happened the other day, which I'll share another time. :)

Saturday, November 7, 2015

Nigh Nigh

Today my baby girl became a toddler, taking her first independent steps in front of all of us.
"Are you going to walk Cierra?"
One small step, then the other foot. We clap and cheer. She claps her hands too.
Then another step and another, a little wobble, then another. We clap more and so does she. She loves the attention and even the twins can't take their eyes off her and her new moves.
Oh this is bitter sweet!
She is only 11.5 months and this is a solid two months ahead of when the twins walked. But she has been crawling for about 4 months now and has been standing so solidly for a couple of weeks.
But it was only a week ago that she walked by leaning really heavily on our hands for support. I didn't expect her to progress quite this fast.
And language too! We have 'Nigh Nigh' which was one of her first actually. (I forgot that in the last post) and now we have "Ehgoh" for "here you go" and "Aahdn" for "all done."
My baby girl is going to be a big girl way too soon for my liking. Although I looove watching her little personality unfold and every new word and lesson learned, I also want to hold her tight and memorize the feel of her little head on my shoulder, her small hand on my chest, her softly rounded  back under my hand, her soft fluffy hair under my cheek.
Oh my baby girl, you are such a complete treasure, my perfect reward for the hard work and difficulty of the twin's first year.
And not to leave them out completely, they are a wonder as well and I am completely loving the age of 4! :) More on them soon!
So, nigh nigh babyhood and good morning toddlerdom. We got this! Let's explore.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Cierra at 10 Months

Cierra will be 11 months old in just 2 days so I really need to sneak in this update.
She has grown up so much this past month it makes my heart hurt a little. Right around the 10 month mark I had to concede that the little blue toddler bath was just too small for her and she graduated to the big bathtub to her utter delight! She loves her bath and the big kid bath toys.
She found her balance this month. She stands up and can carefully lower herself back down when she gets unstable. She can walk/run when holding onto my hands and can almost walk when only holding one hand.
She mimics how the twins play tickle with me by rolling around on my bed and shrieking as I prepare to tickle her. 
It's suddenly clear to me that she understands a LOT! I say, "not in the mouth" and she will hesitate before either popping it into her mouth even faster or looking at it again and deciding I'm right.
I say, "no touching" and she generally listens! Or strongly protests.
And her baby babble is starting to actually seem like real words and in fact I clearly hear the following on a regular basis now: Mama, Dadad, Aah (for Up). Today I heard 'Maah' for More. I'm certain!
She has now formed opinions on a lot of things and intends to be heard. When I take a toy away or remove her from somewhere that is unsafe, she really lets me know. She doesn't stay mad for too long but she certainly gets her point across with a verbal protest and the biggest pouty lip you ever saw.
She is little miss sociable at church wanting to stand on the pew facing the people behind and watch the other kids and give smiles to whoever will pay attention. And she is so confident when alone. I can leave her in the nursery without a second thought. She happily watches the other kids, the louder it is, the more she watches, completely unphased by the noise.
She can play catch! She actually tries to throw a ball to me and is so happy when it comes back to her again and again. (She just gets worried when it's Sam's turn and is impatient for it to come back to her.)
She loves handing things to people and loves grabbing fistfuls of hair and giving it a good hard pull..... Not Rachel's idea of fun!!
Sam loves to tickle her and Rachel loves to make her happy by playing peekaboo and making the most annoying sounds to entertain her in the car. And Cierra adores them both.... as long as she doesn't have to share me too much. ha ha
Yeah, she's Mommy's girl and wants the other two to know it! When I get down on the floor to play with the twins and either of them gets too close to me, like in my lap for a hug or snuggle or rolling around getting tickles, Cierra pushes in between us making it very clear that physically I belong to her... sure I can talk and laugh and help them and our schedule can revolve around theirs needs as much as hers but apparently my body is her domain. I quote, "Mah Mam!" :)

Sunday, October 4, 2015

Best Days

I keep thinking these are the best days of my life. Not the easiest.... not by a long shot! But the best in terms of fulfillment, fun, emotional contentment, purpose. 
Life is hectic and loud and often it's like trying to herd cats or lizards or monkeys. And that's ok because they are my monkeys.
And because I know I will forget, here is a typical Monday in my house right now.
12:35 am baby wakes me, pat her back, put her back down.
4:45 feed baby and get back to sleep.
5:30 baby wakes, comfort her and put her back in crib.
6:00 baby wakes, feed her, wake up her daddy And hand off. Back to bed!
8:00 Andrew gives baby back, feed Cierra, get up and have breakfast while kids play and daddy gets ready for work. Get kids dressed and coiffed. :)
9:00 kids watch tv while I get Cierra to sleep, then shower, get kids snack, unload dishwasher, reload dishwasher 
10:00 Cierra up, feed her snack and get the kids out of the house to get groceries
12:00 home for lunch, feed feed feed....  kids clean up toys to earn TV time, baby crawls around uncleaning what the kids clean, climbs over their cushion forts from the morning.
1:00 put baby down for nap while kids watch tv, clean kitchen, finish putting groceries away, eat cookies and rest for a few minutes. Aaaaah!! 
2:00 Cierra up, get kids outside for fresh air either park or playdate or time digging in the garden
4ish get home give kids pre-dinner veggies to tide them over, get dinner going or just play till Daddy comes home
5ish dinner and clean up and play time
6:00 start getting Cierra ready for bed
6:30 baby down 
7:00 snack for kids, bath, stories, teeth brushing, songs, 
7:30 lights out with multip-le interruptions or quiet play until....
8ish all three kids asleep 
CRASH on the couch!

Good, hectic days full of lots of physical effort but I love it.

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Cierra at 9 months

Life is so good at 9 months!
Life is about laughing and crawling and pulling up to stand. It's about playing peek-a-boo over Mommy's shoulder with the big brother and sister and getting attention by yodeling: Aiyyahyahyahyaya, Naanahnahnahnah Naha nah Nah, and occassionally Mamamahm.
It's about rolling around on the big bed, or on the couch, rubbing your head on the soft surfaces and falling backwards to be caught in the soft cushions.
It's about finding a dolly who has such a beautiful face, you can't stop giving her baby kisses and hugs and lying or sitting on top of her.
It's about following the big kids around and trying to get in the middle of whatever they are up to, especially if it's building block towers that you can topple over, or reading books that look tasty.
It's also about talking one's self to sleep at night and sleeping through until 5am! (Mama learned that the dream feed should happen by the Mama waking up the baby and feeding her, not waiting for her to wake up. That way the baby learns there is No reason to wake up by herself at night time.)
Life is also about food! Ooooh whatever anyone else is eating needs to be shared and consumed if at all possible.
It's about big siblings pushing you on the swing at the park and splashing in the water at the waterpark and kicking and splashing at the pool.
It's about full bodied excitement when the big kids come home after being out and lots of hugs for and from everyone!
Yep, this is the life! (For all of us!:))

Friday, August 14, 2015

Pretty Fancy Outings

Andrew and I try to arrange for one on one time with the twins but it still seems rare. Usually if one wants to do something or go somewhere, the other will too. But that is changing this year and last month Andrew and Sam went out for some boy time.
It was a simple outing to a couple of stores but Andrew said he would see what else they could do and also find some lunch while they were out. I didn't know what this would entail.
Shortly after they returned Sam had to visit the bathroom and needed some assistance so I helped him out. And as he was washing his hands he regaled me with this lovely account of his special time with Daddy.
"We went to the restaurant baffroom and guess what Mommy?
After I peed, the toilet? It flushed all by itself. And that was pretty fancy.
And then we washed our hands and the water turned on all by itself. And that was pretty fancy.
And the soap just came out all by itself. And that was pretty fancy."
I smiled, I laughed, I agreed that it certainly sounded pretty fancy.
So that is what my boy came away with and I hope I never forget how pleased he was to be treated to such a fancy outing. :)
And since it seems wrong to not give equal air time to Rachel, I must share this little outing gem.
We were all at the park for an afternoon last weekend and it started to rain. We decided to walk by the live music that was happening at the amphitheater since we could hear it from the playground. I recognized the musicians as some old friends and Rachel obviously wanted to dance. So we headed up in front of the almost empty benches and let her show off her moves.
Oh my girl, she took my breath away! I adore watching her, and love love love the little kick of her heels.
Sam of course needed to show up briefly as well but was much more aware of the fact that we were in public. Rachel was just in the music and nothing else mattered.
Nothing quite like seeing the world through the eyes of a three year old!

Monday, August 3, 2015

Teefies and Moves

On the weekend at church I felt around Cierra's gums to see if I could feel any little teeth coming in. I had no idea that this little foray would result in any information. Sam and Rachel both didn't get teeth until they were a year.
Boy, was I surprised! Right at the bottom front I could feel the firm little ridges of two teeth coming in. In fact they felt so sharp I was surprised I couldn't see them but as much as I tried, I couldn't.
Today that changed.
Today, two little teefies broke through the skin and broke my heart a little bit at the same time. Of course, I want her to grow up big and strong and full of life and laughter.
AND I want to memorize the feel of her in my arms; the feel of her pushing her face into my shoulder and neck, her strong little body curved into mine in a joyful baby hug. I want to forever remember her goofy high pitched sing song sounds, her cheeky gurgles, the way she stares at her right hand as she holds the palm stretched up in the air as if it is something she cannot control but finds fascinating. I want to remember her utter fascination with the twins, how she can nearly twist her head around backwards to try to watch them from my arms no matter what her mood is.
And not only that, but last week I admitted she is crawling. The week before she could nudge herself around a foot or two but now she can traverse an entire room. On my birthday she actually put two hands and two knees down and crawled. Since then though she seems to have decided that one knee and one foot is the most stable form for cruising around the house.
Yesterday I put up the gate across what was once the dining room and sifted through all the kids toys. Everything that is baby safe can stay in the gated area for everyone to play with. Everything else has to stay out of that space, either in the twins rooms or downstairs.
Oh the times, they are a changing.
And I know it's going to be just the blink of an eye before we are taking that gate down again and selling off the baby toys. So I'm cherishing the moments.

Dear Future Me

I know there will be many times in my future when I will look back on these days when my children were young and long for another chance to experience it.
I know it will happen. In fact, sometimes even now I wish I could hold my two squirming 8 month old twins in my arms again.
So, as an assurance to my future self, I'd like to say:
Stacey, you can only live in the moment you are in and remember the past with fondness.
Don't anguish over any perceived 'loss.' It's not lost, it was lived! And lived well!
Here I sit at 9pm and my two 3 year olds and my 8 month old are fast asleep, the twins in their own rooms, the baby in her crib in mine. I love sharing the room with Cierra.
I am loving this experience of having just one baby! LOVING! I kiss her chubby cheeks a hundred times a day. I coo at her and mimic her sounds, I kiss her neck to make her laugh. I tickle her round little tummy. And I carry her around on my hip far more than I actually need to just to feel her little body pressed against mine.
I am breastfeeding several times a night still and not really pushing for that to end because I love the quiet closeness we get to have. I love looking at the curve of her head in the dim nightlight and having her small hands hold onto my breast. I love how she sometimes will hum or sing as she nurses. I love how the weight of her head feels on my shoulder when I pick her up to put her back in the crib. I love how she tries to suckle my neck or jaw or shoulder when I'm singing to her before a nap or at bedtime. I love when she sings along with me. Oh how I love her.
And I'm enjoying the three year olds too! I am revelling in the twins language and how they now tell stories in their play. They will build on each other's ideas as they play at being cats and dogs and dragons and pirates, "the dragon is very tired and needs a nap..." "And now she waked up because it is morning time." "And she need breakfast!" "Yeah I am very hungry."
These are beautiful, hectic, overwhelming, stressful, amazing, hilarious days. The life I always dreamed of having.
I cannot enjoy it more than I am. I can only be myself in this time and try to appreciate the amazing gift that it is. And I do! And I am.
Thank God

Sunday, July 5, 2015

Sibling Fun and New Moves

Cierra loves us, we all know it, but there is a special something between her and Sam. Of course I understand it, he is a loud, dynamic fellow who is constantly moving. But there is also his love for her that makes her adoration even more complete.
Sam LOVES a good audience and he can almost always make Cierra smile if not laugh out loud.
He is also getting more and more physical with her. He rubs his head on her tummy to make her laugh and she will grab fistfuls of his hair making him laugh.
He will put his fists on her tummy and rock her back and forth with such force that I always check to make sure he's being gentle and she is always laughing and smiling at him. So I try not to interfere, I just remind him we need to be gentle.
He loves to hug her and will sit behind her and pull her backwards so she is lying on top of him which makes them both giggle. Cierra cannot get enough of her big brother!
Of course she loves Rachel too but Rachel is an introvert and less likely to play with Cierra. She is more interested in giving her toys and kisses than wrestling. But she does have a great time playing peekaboo and something about Rachel's high little voice always catches Cierra's attention and interest.
Cierra sits very solidly now and prefers to sit rather than lie down. In fact she only rolls over when she is on a bed, never on the floor. But boy can she ever roll fast... right over to the edge! I often leave Sam in charge of ensuring she doesn't roll off and he takes his job very seriously, sometimes sitting on top of her to keep her from doing another roll. She loves this... so he must not be putting too much weight on her. (right?)
I think she is going to learn to crawl by sitting forward and reaching for things like Rachel did, rather than by rolling and commando crawling like Sam did. I'm just really enjoying this stage where she stays where I put her. :) I'm not encouraging crawling at all!
Sam is as verbal as ever and the game he plays most often is "And then what would happen?"  The "Why?" game happens too but not nearly as much.
I think Rachel is showing signs of being quite an artist and engineer. She can draw surprisingly well for 3.5 and loves to build and organize things.
We just bought pedal bikes and right now it's a love affair that is hot and cold. Hopefully I'll give another update on that soon.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

6 months baby

Cierra is 6 months old and we are having so much fun! This is the start of my favourite stage.... Which lasts for a really long time but, you know, it starts somewhere.
The twins make her laugh and we all love that. She is also sturdy enough to handle great big hugs from the twins which they now love to give. Sam in particular is willing to really work to make her smile or get her to laugh at him, even when she is upset. He's a great mother's helper.
She knows how to fall asleep on her own! Woohoo. But we don't have to be completely rigid about naps, she can be happy for over three hours if we keep things entertaining enough.
She knows how to roll onto her tummy but then doesn't know how to get back so she is stuck and needs help. This is not fun when she wakes up at night but is quite amusing during the day.
She rides around the house on my hip and I wish I could carry her like that forever.
She is content to sit or lie down and play with her toys on her own for about half an hour. And she has always been this way. Makes my life so easy!
She plays shy with people, ducking her face against my shoulder then smiling at them again. Such a cute little flirt.
She sits up all by her big self! I don't want her to grow up any more and yet I love each accomplishment.
On the flip side there are a few things I look forward to her outgrowing.
She is still figuring out how to eat and swallow and it's not going great. She doesn't seem to like eating, although she is fascinated with watching us do it, she doesn't really like the foods I offer her... she doesn't seem to love feeding in general. (Shades of Rachel are showing up and it worries me a little. I've only been able to nurse her lying down for months now.) And we need her to eat as she is not gaining weight the way she is supposed to.
When nursing, she will pluck at my skin with her tiny little pinchy fingers.... irritating to say the least.
Overall, though, I am a very happy woman these days. Summer is going to be all about splash parks and playgrounds and pools on the deck and digging in the dirt ... in between naps for the baby.

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Time, time, time, how you fly

Criminy, how have 3 months gone by??

Well, there were a lot of colds... and then a flu... and the kids are home 5 out of 7 days a week and Daddy has been working Saturdays too... and there were sleep issues that made things difficult... and and and...

However, we are now in a very different place and I vow to get back to documenting life because it is so good. It is so so good that I don't ever want to forget how glorious this time is. I want to be able to read the details of these days some day in the future when all my big kids are driving me nuts. :)

Cierra will be 6 months old this week and she is absolutely fabulous. Three weeks ago we did some serious sleep training and it has changed our lives in a spectacular way. Cierra now only wakes up for feeds at night every 4 hours and she sleeps 1-1.5 hours for her 3 naps a day and she goes down happily talking to herself. It's a beautiful thing! 

She adores the twins, loves watching all they do and finds them very funny too. And they love to make her laugh. I catch them snuggling her, kissing her, and doing all kinds of kid antics to make her laugh. She loves how unpredictable they are and I think living with that makes her a very relaxed little girl. She also is getting very vocal, hollering at her toys, singing to herself. She is a total gem.

The twins are still pretty great too though. :) Some awesome kid moments lately:

When Rachel arrives in a room she'll often say:"Here me are!" 
I love that she still doesn't have her pronouns straight.

A friend of Andrew's visited recently and was reading them the Book with no Pictures. Just as he was about to get to the funny sounds, Rachel says a quiet, anticipatory, sing songy, "here we go..." Andrew and I laughed and laughed.

Shortly after that they were getting horsey rides from this same friend. He's a big guy, really big and after he had been the horse for quite a while, giving them rides together, he said to them, "Now it's my turn." Sam looked him in the eye and deadpan, straight faced, said "Uh oh..."

We howled with laughter. It was so perfect. 

And what was even better was when Sam accepted his responsibility and got down on his hands and knees to try to be the horse. Of course this friend was so big that his knees touched the ground when he 'rode' so the twins didn't have to take any real weight. But I think they liked reciprocating. What a great moment to witness. 

Life is good and I know there are great times ahead too. But I still wish I could pause and make this stage last longer. 

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

12 weeks and Twin news

For a while after Cierra was born the twins were large dangerous obnoxious challenges. (Nothing like motherly love! :P) But they are regaining their charm these days.
Today Sam was finishing his sandwich at lunch and Cierra was watching him intently. He smiled at her, she smiled back, he laughed, she smiled, he laughed harder and then his laugh became the baby giggle I remember from when he was tiny. It was this burbling, stream of giggles, pure music to our ears.
Later the twins were playing together quietly (relatively) during quiet time this afternoon and a lot of the play revolved around cooking and eating Pogerie (perogy). I'd forgotten the mispronunciation that Sam first did at Christmas this year. It was so precious I couldn't correct it.
Cierra is busy learning to shove her fist in her mouth, whacking toys with her hands and getting them stuck not knowing how to let go, lifting her legs and kicking toys on the playmat and no longer pooping at night... Woo hoo! Even if she is cranky I can hold her facing out to watch the twins play and she is transfixed by their activity and noise. She also startles when they get too loud or come close too fast and if they cry, she will too. I think she is a very sympathetic little girl already.
In other twin news, we have potty trained!
A couple of weeks ago on a Thursday night we hit up Walmart and the twins chose big kid underwear. So Friday morning I explained we'd wear the big kid underwear and they should do all the pees and poops on the potty. I made a potty chart and they got a sticker for the chart every time they went and when it was full they'd get to buy a toy.
Sam had two accidents Friday and Rachel had 3.
Saturday Sam was dry all day and all night! Rachel had 7! SEVEN accidents! It was awful and I was ready to throw in the towel. She seemed to deliberately pee on the floor right after we had tried on the potty. We asked her if she knew when the pees were coming and she just didn't seem to know ahead of time? She wanted to please us but maybe the pressure to 'perform' was too high? I felt totally hopeless.
Sunday Sam was dry all day and all night again! Rachel had 3 or 4 accidents but she did try when we asked her to go.
Monday they each had one accident after naps and Rae had another one or two but then Andrew's friend came over after dinner and she actually tried to get to the potty while he was here and was mostly successful. Seemed like she was more aware of her body or not wanting to pee in front of someone else.
So I sent them to daycare with lots of changes of clothes. Rae only had one accident and it was on the way to the bathroom so she made huge progress pretty quickly in figuring out when she needs to go.
There is no turning back now. We are potty training/ed and life will never be the same. I'm kind of glad we are here and kind of still stressed over the number of accidents in our future but they are ready. At 2.5 weeks in, we only have a couple of accidents every couple of days and usually it's in the bathroom, just not getting the pants down quick enough.

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

10 weeks of baby

Sometimes it feels like I have a baby and the rest of the family life is just going on as best it can with me ... Encumbered. The twins don't pay much attention to Cierra yet.... But as she gets more and more alert, they are getting more interested. Sam acts downright bashful when she smiles at him. It's heartwarming.
And I am loving this amazing encumbrance. :)
On the days when the twins are home all day, Cierra tends to be quite wide awake. I think it may be an evolutionary thing.... Poor little girl better stay alert or she may get run over... Or completely forgotten in the mayhem that goes on when three years olds are cooped up in the house too long.
At 10 weeks she is finding her hands and chewing on them, batting at her toys and content to spend about half an hour alone on her play mat. But she loooves cooing and smiling and talking to anyone who will talk to her.
This weekend she cried real sympathy tears which was heartbreaking. Sam came to me crying about something and I was changing Cierra. I looked at him with concern and sympathy and probably a little frown on my face and when I looked back Cierra had her lower lip pushed out and her face all screwed up and she cried and cried these beautiful sympathetic tears. She cried as long as Sam did as I tried to comfort them both. Ah my sweet expressive children. So easy to read.
Rae on the other hand would have looked and then looked away and moved on to playing whatever she was interested in. But here is the thing. Even though she appears not to care, appears to be unmoved or not listening to us, she is! She is listening, she is moved, she just doesn't show it the same way and I need to be more aware of that, give her more time to process things and find a way to connect with her feelings in a way that meets her needs. I haven't figured out what that way is yet. It's not verbal, that's for sure..... And verbal is my way so I need to stretch myself a bit to connect with her.
This motherhood thing is so tricky and mothering three is going to always leave me feeling challenged. And I'm so grateful to be up for that and blessed with the challenge.

Thursday, January 22, 2015

Sick times 5

Ok I'm done with being sick! This cold just won't let go of us; Andrew, me and Cierra are still in the thick of it. Rae and Sam seem to be better.... Or are just taking a short break before a new onslaught!

Nothing sadder than a sick baby, I feel guilty. Luckily she's such a happy little soul that even with the nasty cough and congestion she is still mostly happy and just wants to talk and smile at you all day long. :) she really is the best baby ever.

At her 2 month check up she weighed 11 lbs 7 oz, 50th percentile and was 59cm, 85th percentile for height. Woo hoo! Grow baby! She is wearing clothes that Rae wore when she was 6 months old. That gives me some comfort when she is coughing up a lung, she's a strong little girl.

Hopefully we will all be better sometime in the next couple of weeks.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Settling in at 7 weeks

It's Jan 14 and we are just now officially finished with the holidays.
The tree and decorations are down, the last guests left yesterday and today is my first day alone with all three little kids in about a month.
I'm not going to lie, it was a stressful Christmas season this year. Post partum, death of a pet, guest hoopla, lack of routine, colds and then second colds for everyone, and oh, the daycare provider went on holiday so the twins have been at home for three straight weeks.
Home, sick and it's cold and grey and rainy outside.
But we've done relatively well when all is said and done. The kids got good bonding time with their grandparents. I got a little help during the day with the twins and my MIL took charge of dinner, FIL in charge of kitchen clean up every night. I got more time with Cierra and I appreciated that. I also got more time with the twins and had the opportunity to prove that I can indeed get out with all three of them by myself. :) I'm very proud of that!
Cierra continues to be a sweet, relaxed baby. At 7 weeks she is full of smiles and coos and squeaks as she tries so hard to communicate. I wish she were a little less gassy, wish she slept a little better at night but I really can't complain too much. I pretty regularly get one 3 hour stretch of sleep at some point during the night and that makes a huge difference to my days. Random sunny days also help a LOT!
My anxiety has settled down to what I consider normal and I'm looking forward to the weeks ahead as Cierra grows bigger and we establish more of a routine of awake and asleep time.
The twins continue to surprise me, being so good when I'm home alone with them and playing very well when I least expect it. They also continue to drive me nuts, weird sleep issues cropping up, being truly mean to each other, playing too rough, not listening and in general being the emotional time bombs that 3 year old are. But overall, we're making progress and as we all get healthy again I think we'll all be less emotionally volatile. :)
I'm so looking forward to all that 2015 will hold; all of Cierra's firsts, being home with the kids this spring and summer, the twins starting preschool in the fall.
It's going to be a great year, I can feel it.